Yesterday, I received my first hater comment and it was very discouraging and hurtful. I almost threw in the towel and gave up writing all together. I know, I was a huge baby. You’d think I’d never taken an ounce of criticism before in my life which is completely not true. I grew up in theatre. Acting, Directing, Stage Managing, you name it I probably did it. I also grew up painting and writing. All of those things come with constant critique and harsh remarks. I never had an issue with it. Sure I bitched for like 2 seconds each time, but then I came back full force like ‘BOOM, in your face.’
So here I am people. Vulnerable little Ella, which is completely new to me.
I was the kid that loved meeting new people. When I was 6, I walked up to anyone and everyone that would listen and said, “Hi, my name is Ella. My birthday is June 16th. Buy Belle.” I don’t even remember if I got Belle that year but I met a ton of people. :)
I also made my mother, or whoever was taking me shopping, announce me as I came out of the dressing room.
“PRESENTING ELLA IN HER HIGHLY FASHIONABLE JEANS & T-SHIRT.”
Clearly, I liked attention a lot and that didn’t change much over the years…
I’ve been on the stage for 18 years (wow, that’s a long time) and I never once got stage fright. I took a lot of crap throughout the years about the way I spoke, what I wore, my weight, even my boobs. It didn’t discourage me from continuing. I just kept moving forward, improving my work and busting my bum to make sure they didn’t have something to say come opening night. Of course, they always had something to say after every performance unless it was closing night.
So here I am, fighting back. Letting my voice out for all to hear because isn’t that we are really out here wanting to do in this big blog world?
So my advice?
-If it strikes you as something you should write about, then you should write about it. No matter if its on a napkin at a coffee shop, toilet paper at a bar or here on your computer, write it out because really, this is for you not everybody else.
-Don’t pull an Ella and let someone’s hurtful words come at you and try and take this outlet away from you. It isn’t worth it and if you can’t seem to pull yourself out of that, talk to someone that inspires/supports you to write. Then come flip ‘em the bird and continue moving forward.
Finally,
-Be who you are and accept that if other people can’t accept you, to hell with them. This was something I learned a long time ago, I just had to remind myself that it applies in every aspect of life.
-Ella
p.s. To the dude that didn’t like my post, POUND SAND.
Welcome back Ella. Upstart Bunnies for the win!
p.s To the dude that didn’t like your last post, I’m sure regulars around here can figure out who you are. Way to make yourself unpopular.
Oh, Ella… way to put one of those fingers on each hand up. You’re the real slim shady… through and through. Bunny tail wiggles and I’m off to edit my Monday post. We’re here to stay, y’all. Get used to it.
I’m ‘the dude’ that left the comment that Ella speaks of. The comment I left was indeed harsh, but I still stand by it. Ella had written a post that was nonsensical. It was her ranting about some undefined ‘system’ that she works with at her 9 to 5. In my comment I stated I believed her post read more like a LiveJournal or Facebook rant, and not of the quality that Upstart Blogger was once known for. Her post was devoid of any meaning or relation to the audience of Upstart Blogger, basically, it sucked.
Apparently, Ella or the editor(s) agreed because the post has disappeared. In my comment I chastised Ella for not putting a little effort into her post and making it relate to blogging, Upstart Blogger’s main subject. Again, it looks like my efforts worked, because Ella has found a way to relate this personal post back to blogging. Ella, you should thank me rather than telling me to ‘pound sand’. If you feel that your original post has merit, I suggest you repost it. See what additional comments come in. Prove me wrong.
In my original comment I stated that the overall quality of Upstart Blogger has suffered, again, I stand by that. Upstart Blogger was once a great site about ‘blogging’, devoid of the BS trying to sell ebooks or referrals to affiliate programs.
Okay, Ashley’s whole Twitter Rocket Profit (or whatever it’s name was) thing was a bit much, and honestly is when the quality of Upstart Blogger began to degrade. However, it seemed Ashley sensed this too and sold it off.
I had looked forward to UB returning to it’s roots; an experienced blogger (or bloggers) providing advice for the ‘upstart blogger’. Instead, it’s become the opposite, admittedly inexperienced bloggers providing the posts. This site has lost it’s identity and so far is squandering a great opportunity. I’ve noticed that UB does not have an about seciton, mission statement, nor direction.
So far, the posts are of poor quality, however, Stay at Home Babe is showing potential. At least, she’s on the right track with her most recent post.
I will offer an apology to Ella, though, I absolutely don’t want you to stop blogging. I’m sorry that my harshness made you question doing something you enjoy. I truly want you to succeed. I want you to become a juggernaut of blogging. However, the quality needs to improve. Especially considering the history of UB. If you can’t take criticism, no matter how harsh, you should suggest to the owner of UB that comments be disabled.
Please, allow this comment through moderation, if anything it will stir up a little controversy and start some comments rolling, maybe giving this blog a needed jolt of life.
P.S. – To JJ, you’re veiled threat is pretty silly. I am a regular. If anything, this is going to make me uber-popular among the original UB audience.
P.S.S. – I know I’ve talked a lot of trash. I’m willing to stand up for myself. To the editor of UB: my email address is authentic, send me the details about blogging on UB that you described in the ‘Paid blogging positions…’ post. I currently do not have anything to promote, but I’m willing to put my foot in my mouth.
@TheDude. Respect man, for coming back and apologizing like that. Jolt! I’m with you on that brother. Let’s kick some life into this place!
@Ella welcome back. Stay this time. A blog this big needs thick skinned bloggers.
@TheDude who are you? Congrats on having the grapefruits to apologize.
@JJ I’m kicking. How do I get in on this party?
Go Ella! It is important to get your voice out there…and opening yourself up for comments is for good AND bad! I am one who gets my feelings hurt if someone “unfriends” me on Facebook, but such is life. Way to get up, dust yourself up, and open yourself up to all comments once again!